Waiting for Lush

Aunty Mod

“Arrgghh”

The Aunties often wait for Aunty Lush, with some fear and trepidation – being in another country just highlighted it…

The day was warm. The Palem Garden Hotel Bali was gleaming. The pool twinkled and waved. It was quiet except for the occasional laughter from outside the gates. The sisters though were wary. It was Aunty Lush arrival day.

The Aunty with six heads, likely in individual suitcases, was due to arrive later that afternoon. She is renown for her ability to party endlessly, look effortlessly made up, and be the world’s most charming host. It was only possible surely with the advantage of having a few extra heads hidden away, and replaced each morning ready to party again.

For the rest of the Aunties (who only had one head each) it meant nothing, for that day was settled. With Lush due in at witching hour, it was the last chance for a dignified calm. The other Aunties have never been able to keep up with Lush. Never despite numerous attempts; solo and in groups.

The Aunties all found ourselves at the poolside bar:

  • Aunty Beads laid out under a big umbrella with her magazine, flicking pages unread, unseeing
  • Aunty Darling painted her toenails, seemingly oblivious to the change that was coming
  • Aunty Verve read her book flipping over pages like a woman possessed
  • Aunty Mod, moving through images I had crafted with my camera, nothing settled

The air was thick with expectation, oppressive with anxiety, even the staff seemed to be aware of the tension, glancing awkwardly at the Aunties every few minutes. The clock ticked inexorably on, and on, and on…

A car arrived. The staff scurried to the hotel entrance. Aunty Beads looked over at Aunty Verve and mouthed the words ‘She’s here’. Aunty Darling looked up from her toes and muttered ‘Shit’ under her breath. I just watched the gate, butterflies growing to bumble bees. It seemed to take an eternity.

Finally Aunty Lush rounded the gate, handbag flipped over her shoulder, sunnies on, wide brimmed hat, with five staff in tow with her bags and her daughter. Her face broke into a huge smile, ‘Champagne anyone?’

Heads would roll… How many beers is enough Aunty Beads? There are never enough Aunty Verve!

donny-and-beads

Here is Aunty Verve when she thought she could handle it… she was wrong…

Aunty Verve

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Comments
17 Responses to “Waiting for Lush”
  1. Colleen Filippa says:

    We were all keeping ourselves nice .. until Lush came and messed us all up.

  2. Aunty Mod says:

    I feel like a kid whenever she is around, for the first hour, then i feel like a total grown up, all in control, for the second hour, then I feel nothing – for hours! Then finally next day I feel – everything!!!!!

  3. Erin says:

    And beforehand I feel like a whirlwind is headed my way, no escape, this time I can survive it… can’t I?

  4. aunty lush says:

    what a wonderful blog – I was getting quite excited waiting for me to arrive too. when’s the next trip aunties, got my champers chilling and ready to go!

  5. Suffering Stphen says:

    It is noteworthy that even Cerberus the hideous and terrifying creature that guarded the gates of Hades, only had three heads!

  6. Kerry says:

    I googled that ‘suffering Stephen’ and found that other sources portrayed the creature as having 50 or 100 heads and only later pictured with three and sometimes with the tail of a serpent!! Cerebus was also known to permit spirits to enter but none to leave. Scared yet ??

  7. Erin says:

    Or indeed Hecate, the goddess and ruler of earth sea and sky had three heads, however she also had two torches… How many drinks can you carry at once Lush?

  8. Anna (rookie) says:

    It’s true! This little rookie has taken on each head of the Lush… And with each time a confidence that says “maybe this head!”, the little rookie again ends up on eBay trying to sell her ruined head and trying to find a stronger one with extra storage for liquid! And then alas the next day text that we all hear coming before it lands… The picture of the flawless head of the lush and the question… The question… “darling, where are you? We are back for round 2!” x

    • Donna says:

      Oh darling Anna, no amount of practice will be enough. We are all rookies next to Lush!! Its great to turn the head of Cerebus in another direction for a moment though. Thanks…

  9. aunty lush says:

    Hey there rookie, you’re well and truly in training, won’t be long now, just need to find you the next day !

  10. Anna (rookie) says:

    I am in training but i feel i have begun a lifelong journey. You will find me under the doona nursing the one and only head that I can’t seem to multiply! Lol!

  11. Donna says:

    Aunty Verve with the ‘holiday burner’ ?? oh dear ….

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  1. […] Aunty Lush is a constant challenge to all of us as she asks ‘When’s the last time you did something for the first time?” She usually can answer ‘Yesterday’. […]



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